Tom Cruise jumps off a mountain, rides a biplane, drowns, un-drowns, and then punches an AI avatar in the face. The stunts? Still insane. Still illegal in some countries. Still, the reason your uncle calls him “the last real movie star” every Thanksgiving. And you know what? I’m not even mad.
This movie is trying to be epic, emotional, and philosophical. It’s like someone dared Tom Cruise to make The Matrix but with more cardio. There are scenes where Ethan Hunt stares into mirrors trying to be introspective and deep. His character is clearly trying to bring some depth to this movie. Am I supposed to feel something? Because I kind of just wanted more explosions.
The first hour moves like it’s stuck buffering. We get a flashback, a flash-forward, and a flash-why-do-I-care. And then halfway through it’s like the editor woke up and remembered it’s an action movie. Also, they introduced four new characters and forgot to write two of them. There’s a hacker girl with emotional trauma and a former MI6 guy who exists purely to say cryptic things in a British accent. Cool. But why are they here?
The villain is ChatGPT with daddy issues kinda. Literally. It’s an AI trying to control the world through surveillance and vague metaphors. And at one point it says something like, “To be free is to be unseen,” and I was like… okay, Socrates, relax.
Is it the best Mission: Impossible movie? Nah. That’s still Fallout. But is it a solid, overstuffed, occasionally self-important, visually stunning farewell to a dude who’s been sprinting full-tilt since 1996? Yeah. And I respect that.Just… maybe bring caffeine. And patience. And like, a flowchart.
